The Darkness Does Not Overcome It

Every Advent, my church community (Grace University) has a soup supper and vespers on Wednesday evenings. As John and I walked quickly to Grace from the coffee shop on the corner, I couldn't wait to get inside and gather with folks I love on a cold, dark evening. To warm our bellies with yummy soup, bread, and goodies over good conversation.

The light shines in the darkness and the darkness does not overcome it. John 1:9

For many Christians, we know this verse by heart. We keep this close during the season of Advent, during the seasons of pain and hurt that we experience in our lives. For someone who struggles with depression and darkness, the light is not the easiest to find, but luckily, I have found supportive, deep, authentic, real and loving friends. Friends who are there through the shit and the darkness and bring the light.

I am grateful for those friends, for the community at Grace that understands, forgives, searches, digs deep, and cares for each other in the best way we know how. God is truly present in this community as we live lives together and care enough to sit through the darkness and come out together in the light. That is very rare. Or maybe it seems rare because I haven't found community like this that has these deep conversations and is full of truth telling.

Tonight, I was thinking a lot about Holden Village for two reasons: 1. because I miss my sister and I love her. I wish I had back the intentionality of our relationship 2. because Holden is a place apart, not a utopia, but a place that intentionally does community, that asks the deeper questions, that is authentic. It is a place that understands darkness as it doesn't see the sun for two months of the year. The community literally sits together in darkness, but it isn't overcome by it. The Holden Hilarity keeps the light shining bright in the midst of winter.

Tonight, I am thinking a lot about the darkness in my life. Having depression, the darkness can overcome the light. It can block you in a tiny and deep corner. Thank you to those who have opened the door and exposed the darkness to light, to those who have sat with me, and continue to sit with me and wait for the light. It does come and you have all shown me that.