Stillness

I have a hard time sitting still. I always need to be doing something: cleaning, organizing, reading, doing a craft project, gardening, taking care of something, running, spending time with someone; the list could do on and on....

With John gone this morning, the garden weeded, the house cleaned after hosting a party yesterday. I am sitting still on my deck. Everything is so still. The wind is not blowing, Bear is sleeping, the world has not arisen to make noise. I am looking out at my garden and watching a bee buzz around my coneflowers. Isn't this the way God intended life to be? Peaceful, simple, and beautiful.

Summer flies by so fast as there is so much to do, like biking, bbqs, and more. This past week, I had a commitment every night. This is the tension in my life: to have connection and be with people as I seek community yet have a simple life. When I make too many commitments, then I want my life to slow down and be simple. But when my life gets too simple, I make too many commitments. I don't think this will ever be resolved. I want the best of both worlds, but this morning, I am content to drink coffee, sit on my deck, read, and play with my puppy in the stillness and quiet of the day.