Working Woman

This past fall, I have officially been in the adult workforce for 10 years!  I can remember when I started my first jobs how young I felt, how unequipped, but not wanting to show that I was so naive. Now, what I realize 10 years later, I have learned some things, have some experience, and still have a lot more to learn. My "career" has included everything from determining parenting goals with women fleeing domestic violence at the age of 24, to working with youth in congregations, to leading an Interfaith group to end homelessness in our community.

"Is the life I am living the same as the life that wants to live in me?" A few years ago, I read Parker Palmer's book Let Your Life Speak, which is where the quote is from above. Palmer's book was one of the most helpful books in terms of thinking about our work as vocation (a Lutheran word, described by Palmer as where one's gifts meets the world's deepest needs) . Palmer worked a variety of different jobs, but they never felt quite right. It was well into his adulthood that he realized that writing was a love that he could pursue as his vocation. He has written beautiful books.

Where do my gifts meet the world's great needs? Having shelter is a world need, but is it where I can best be used?

Year of 2012 - what will it bring?

“At first glance it may appear too hard. Look again. Always look again.” ― Mary Anne Rodmacher
 
For much of my life, I have dwelt on the hard stuff, stood on the rocky terrain, focused on the negative parts of life. I am not unrealistic that this will go away without a fight, that one day I will wake up and find that all the focus on the harshness of life and negativity in my head will be gone.

But I do start this year, wondering 2012 has for me. Many people start with resolutions: eating right, exercising, add something to their life, or take something away. Resolutions seem to me half-hearted as they are pie in the sky changes people want to make without thinking about the real implications and the determination they will need to have to make the resolutions happen.

In a sermon at Grace during Advent, Pastor Mary challenged us to consider what kind of lives we were living. What do we like? What regrets or grudges need to be lifted from our lives. What new ways can we move forward?


What new path will be followed? How do I want to embrace life in the next year? In a world where one can easily get lost, lose focus, be carried away until one realizes that what they want is no where near what they have. I don't know if I have a clear vision of what I want 2012 to be or have happen, but I do know that I desire deeper connections. I desire a deeper relationship and partnership with my husband of two and a half years. I want to continue to encourage each other, to delve deeper into who each other is and wants to become. I also know that I desire to delve deeper into the women relationships in my life. 2012: the year relationships. Has a good ring, right?

Bear

Once upon a time, there was a woman who fell in love with a boy. They got married and "lived happily ever after." In this "happily ever after", they decided to get a dog!

For a long time, John and I have been talking about getting a dog. We finally decided this summer was the right time to add a little guy to our household. After meeting a few puppies, we decided to get Bear.

He loves our place. He has dug holes in our back yard, dug up plants, ruined socks, and chews on our porch. And we love him. And he is so smart!  He has learned how to sit, lay down, stay. And we love him.

Storms a'brewin

Today, a big storm came through Minneapolis and St. Paul. The winds whipped the trees back and forth, pelted the windows with rain drops and darkened the sky to deep shades of blueish gray. All day, one could tell that something was happening. It was dark out beginning in the early morning hours. It took all morning of brewing to have a big storm out during the day. It rained for a good couple of hours and gave way to an evening that cleared off.

Lately, I have been feeling like something is a'brewin. Something is churning inside me. Some desire is seeking to be fulfilled. I am not sure what it is, but I am ready to explore that churning some more. Maybe, I need to have an all out hard rain to figure out what it is I need. Whatever it is, I know it will be beautiful!

What is churning inside you?

Stillness

I have a hard time sitting still. I always need to be doing something: cleaning, organizing, reading, doing a craft project, gardening, taking care of something, running, spending time with someone; the list could do on and on....

With John gone this morning, the garden weeded, the house cleaned after hosting a party yesterday. I am sitting still on my deck. Everything is so still. The wind is not blowing, Bear is sleeping, the world has not arisen to make noise. I am looking out at my garden and watching a bee buzz around my coneflowers. Isn't this the way God intended life to be? Peaceful, simple, and beautiful.

Summer flies by so fast as there is so much to do, like biking, bbqs, and more. This past week, I had a commitment every night. This is the tension in my life: to have connection and be with people as I seek community yet have a simple life. When I make too many commitments, then I want my life to slow down and be simple. But when my life gets too simple, I make too many commitments. I don't think this will ever be resolved. I want the best of both worlds, but this morning, I am content to drink coffee, sit on my deck, read, and play with my puppy in the stillness and quiet of the day.

Summer Minnesota Style

Ahhhh. That is how I felt today. Nowhere to go, no agenda, no time constraints.

Summer has been flying by with John and I booked solid with many adventures. Don't get me wrong, I loved traveling up north to a cabin and to New Jersey for a wedding. I loved bbqs, Spanish and Chilean wine parties, Twins games, Caleb ball games, and many other adventures. I also enjoyed going to Omaha since I have never been there before John's family reunion weekend.

Have a weekend with zero plans is lovely and this has been so good. It was perfect for the body and the soul. I love taking advantage of summer in the city - being in the garden, three hour bike rides, fresh homemade food, eating on our deck outside. Today, dawned a sunny and bright day, with a breakfast of huevos rancheros made by John, which aren't so Minnesotan, but still so good. John always laughs at me because I made a lot of noises while eating (mmmm....ooooo, you get the picture).

After breakfast, John and I enjoyed a three hour bike ride along the river, into Minneapolis, under Target Field, down the Midtown Greenway, past a bike event, and ending with a salted caramel ice cream cone at Izzy's.

The afternoon was spent watching the Twins lose on TV, but it as a good game. Cleaning up the house, and preparing for dinner. Dinner was amazing! The perfect day ended with the fresh fig, arugula, mozzarella, chives, and tomato homemade pizza.

With a sunned and tired body, I go to bed with a smile on my face and happy to have summer here to enjoy.

Living History: travels to South Jersey

Four McAllister Generations

From Left: Harry, Grace, Francy, Betsy, Grandpop (Harry Sr.), Josh, Grandmom (Margie), Heidi and John.

John's Teaburning relatives - Alexander Moore, Henry Seeley and Josiah Seeley.

Grandmom and Grandpop McAllister

John and I spent a couple of days in New Jersey last weekend. John's cousin, Meredith, got married so it was a great reunion of family, most of whom I have met a couple of times. We enjoyed spending time with family, but one of my favorite parts of the trip was hearing stories from John's Grandmom and Grandpop and also from his dad, Harry. I deeply love John's family, his parents are always fun to be around and his grandparents are the sweetest people I have ever met. His Grandmom has Alzheimers and his Grandpop takes care of her. His Grandmom loves to tell stories...many of them over and over. I love hearing how they met: at church. His Grandmom was in the choir and she saw Harry McAllister, Sr. in the pews. She orchestrated a double date.

With John's dad, Harry, you hear the whole history of the family. On the way from the airport, we passed a bridge where John's ancestor fought during the revolutionary war. An ancestor of John's ran a Room and Board house with a tavern (see above picture). His name was Jacob Ware, which is on Grandpop's side of the family. I also saw where Harry's grandfather lived and where Harry grew up and went to school. John's Grandpop has not moved more than a two mile radius during his life. His Grandmom has always lived in Cumberland County. Many McAllisters populate the area.

I grew up on a farm that has been in my family for five generations and have always been interested in the history of the farm and family. There is something about the history in south jersey that is different for me than from learning about my family history. I can't figure out if it is the length of history: being in the revolutionary war and the civil war and everything in between, or if it is the fact that it is all brand new to me. Either way, I loved hearing the stories.

I look forward to the next time we go back. The area is like stepping back in time. So many houses are still in tact from the late 1700s or 1800s. And still beautiful. I would love a tour or even to live in one. Although, both John and his parents recommended that I not live in one.

It was a beautiful trip with a wedding, history, family and much, much laughter. My kind of weekend.